Coulda woulda shoulda had glaucoma.

I went to the optometrist yesterday. He tested me for glaucoma. I failed.

FUCK.

So what if glaucoma is a neuro-optical disease that causes blindness. I may have to be blind, but I could also have much beautifuller, longer eyelashes.

The New York Times article says that there is a treatment for glaucoma that has a side effect of making your eyelashes grow longer. "How much longer?," you ask. Long enough for Allergan, the same company that carries Botox, to snatch this drug up and farm it out to future sweet 16ers and beauty whores of America.

Forgive the eye pun, but David E. I. Pyott says, "And he suggested that many women would not blink at spending $120 for a one-month, three-milliliter supply of the drug. He compared the cost of longer lashes to a daily cup of coffee."

As the perscription for Latisse is not covered by insurance for people who do not have glaucoma, beware of a sudden vanity-induced hypochondria toward eye disease by women who want to be ultra-lashtastic.

And, of course, it has other possible side effects, such as darkening skin around the eyes, redness and itchiness of the eyes, and oh yeah - CHANGING EYE COLOR. Green or hazel eyes permanently turn darker. Oh well!

I was so close to obtaining eyelashes that are typically 25 percent longer, 106 percent thicker, and 18 percent darker, black and red itchy eyes, and an obsession with out-lashing the lashiest of eyelashes.

Here's the whole lame/juicy article:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/14/health/research/14lash.html?_r=1&hp